She came to me like a smooth sea breeze,
Her hair as black as night,
In her wide arms she held me close,
I held her with all my might.
She whispered softly and laid my mind to rest,
I told her what my heart possessed,
It was lonely and loveless,
It was frozen and lifeless,
It was filled with grief and sadness.
She placed her hand on my chest,
I took a deep breath to quell my unrest,
Your heart isn't empty and lifeless,
It's filled with lots of love,
More love than this world possesses,
I don't feel loved, I said,
I can't give love, I said.
She looked at me with her deep blue eyes,
And saw through all my lies,
She laughed and stared through me.
If I kiss you, will you indulge me?
I looked at her and said, "you serious",
"Watch me", she looked at me playfully.
She placed her lips on my lips and kissed me through and
through,
I let go of my inhibitions and followed through,
We kissed and kissed till I was blue,
My heart was beating like it was anew.
I looked at her joyfully for I knew,
She had saved me from pain,
A life without love.
I held her with all my might,
Until she let go and dissipated into thin light.
I searched her here, I searched her there,
My aching heart was beyond despair.
I cried out loud wishing she would hear,
No response as I feared.
Then one night she came back to me,
Beautiful as the day I laid eyes on her,
I wept and asked her why,
All she did was tell me I didn't try.
I didn't try to understand,
I didn't try to change,
I didn't try to let go,
I was still the same.
The same cynic, the same pessimist,
The same man she met all those years ago,
I couldn't be changed, she said.
I would die alone, she said.
I looked at her teary eyed.
That's how it's always been my dear,
I don't change you don't change the world doesn't change.
My heart wasn't filled with love,
It was filled with selfishness.
It cared about itself ,
To the point of self loathing.
I realise now I was wrong,
To hold onto you for so long.
Go now and leave me alone,
For my heart will love itself I know.
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